Lost in Translation

short & Silly

I'm writing this for my beautiful niece, Caitlin, who's probably never heard this story. I hope she finds it entertaining. Her parents might not know what happened twenty years ago to their car when left in my car, so here's hoping I still have a sister after this post.

Everyone in my family is incredibly unique, and often I wonder how we could possibly be related. We have the biker babe, the Stay at home mom, the computer geek, the yuppie puppy ... and well, me ... the troublemaker. Even when I'm not trying to find trouble, it finds me. Anyone who read my posts about the Secret Service will understand this.

Even in high school I was politically active. I marched in protests, volunteered for campaigns, and signed people up to vote. Who would have thought protests and demonstrating something you believe in could cause trouble?

My sister Renee moved to San Diego when I was in my teens. So at 19, I flew out to visit her and her husband. Although we did a lot of sight seeing together of the typical tourist attractions of Sea World, Balboa Park, and Del Coronado, they left their car for me to drive while they were at work. A BMW. It might have been older, but to a kid it was still a Beemer and I thought I was cool driving it.

While I was cruising around downtown San Diego, I stopped at a traffic light just as a group of demonstrators passed by. I asked someone what the cause was for, and one woman came to the car to convince me to join them. A California woman shot and killed her son's child molester, and the protesters were fighting for her release. It didn't take much convincing for me to realize a dead molester is better than a mom in jail, so I parked the car and joined in. The woman promised to take me back to the corner where the car was parked once the event concluded.

I should have written down the street names, but who would have thought I would lose the woman in a crowd of 20,000 people? After a few hours and lots of screaming and chanting, I decided it was best to try to find the car again. That was a big no-go!  The sky darkened as I rode the streets of San Diego on buses looking for the car. 

What was that? Why didn't I call my sister you ask?

And say what?  "Hi Renee, I don't know where I am, but I lost your husband's car. So pick me up at the corner store so we can join up to comb the city together?"  Yeah, I'm sure that would have gone over quite well.  Luckily, I had $200 in cash on me and found the car before I spent it on bus transfers.

In case you couldn't figure it out, Renee and her hubby are the "Yuppie Puppies" of the family. Sometimes I think back to the first time Andrew visited our family for a holiday dinner. My biker babe sister Lee (who many of you might remember) was quite emotional that year and started a big argument. Just picture five siblings, three husbands, two small children, and my mother ... in a pear tree ... all screaming and yelling.

Gabby's hubby had been with our family for a decade and a half, so he was quite accustomed to our occasional outbursts. When emotions broke loose, he continued eating at the dinner table while the rest of us adjourned to the living room to settle the dispute. Renee's new husband, Andrew, did not know how to react. He was torn between wanting to settle the issue for us and staying out of family business. He turned to Gabby's husband, Sal, and asked, "Should we assist them? What should we do?"

Sal shoveled a fork of pasta in his mouth, took a sip of soda, and responded, "Duck if you see something flying." He continued eating.  I wish I could have seen Andrew's face at that remark, but I was busy in the other room at the time.  I'm sure it is quite similar to the time he was demonstrating his wine tasting abilities. He's quite the connoisseur. He didn't get the reaction from my family he expected when Lee's husband turned and said, "You go to wine tasting events? They used to call me a real Wino too, but since my spinal injury I can't touch the stuff." Something was definitely Lost in Translation there.

I hope you enjoyed today's post. Coming Monday, I will start posting book reviews again. Be sure to look for my FREE promo of Goin' Postal & The Creek. It will be free for a couple days this coming week. :)

Also check out my "Awesome Author" page for some great reads. There are plenty who have their books available FREE on Kindle Unlimited.

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